Conversations.

I said, I love the quote.

"I wanna live with a musician. She'd write songs at home and ask me
what I thought of them, and maybe even include one of our little
private jokes in the liner notes."

Then 'S' said:

"i love that quote, but doesn't the film suggest in the end that this
is just an empty dream, just wishful thinking? that you can't CHOOSE
the person you love in this clinical, scientific way?

one of my pet peeves in life (as i've mentioned so many times) is the
apparent gap between who you want and who you need - - a person you
*fall* in love v/s a person you *want* to fall in love with.

because as far as i remember, the musician fling doesn't work out for
rob gordon!
:'( "

Then I said:

"i love the quote independent of the outcome in the film, i love it just by itself. i don't really know if i would really love to live a musician, i just find the idea very romantic.
you know, a lot of things in life are about wishful thinking. and it's fun because it's wishful thinking. it gives you something to look forward to. If something is already perfect, there is always a catch somewhere, you know, maybe you just did not see the *conditions apply written in fine print, because you were so overwhelmed by its perfection. You know, you make things perfect for yourself...there are always compromises, it's whether you choose to make them or you have no choice but to make them...that's where all the difference lies.

another train of thought,
i believe you consciously make a decision of falling in love, it doesn't happen of its own accord. choosing a person in a clinical, scientific way, sounds cold, but you minimize your errors that way.
If you choose to fall in love without thinking, you have chosen to be blind in love. which means you have to compromise a lot more to account for your blind decision (I'm not saying it's wrong, i'm saying you always have an option to do otherwise, you simply choose to ignore it).
With wanting to fall in love, you are still falling in love, but with your eyes wide open...you know exactly what you are getting into, the parameters are already set, therefore the compromises, much less. i feel its a lot safer that way.

and the gap you speak of, in the first case you are already in love so it doesn't matter anyways, with the *want* to fall in love, you are willing to fall in love, so you are almost there, the rest is taking another step forward."

And the conversation ends.

Why did I make the conversation public, you ask?
Coz these things have predominantly been on my mind, last couple of days.

hmmn...

I fully justify my stand to me, then, why does my heart still feel heavy?